because I feel inadequate

Satan's angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first I didn't think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then he told me, "My grace is enough; it's all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness." Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ's strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become. 2 Corinthians 8-10 (The Message)

I more or less hate that scripture, God. Not so much the first part as the second, the "I was glad to let it happen" part. I mean, honestly, could Paul have been any more cloying? But it's true I feel inadequate in so many ways and have hope -- on my good days -- that you will bring good out of my pitiful condition. And that's pretty much all I have to say for now, for fear of sounding pretty cloying myself. I'm glad you are you, Mighty One.

on the death of a child

Peace has been stripped away, and I have forgotten what prosperity is. I cry out, “My splendor is gone! Everything I had hoped for from the Lord is lost!” …I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!” Lamentations 3:17-24

We were crushed and overwhelmed beyond our ability to endure, and we thought we would never live through it. In fact, we expected to die. But as a result, we stopped relying on ourselves and learned to rely only on God, who raises the dead. And he did rescue us from mortal danger, and he will rescue us again. We have placed our confidence in him, and he will continue to rescue us. And you are helping us by praying for us. 2 Corinthians 1:8-11 (NLT)

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18 (NIV)

The prayer of a person living right with God is something powerful to be reckoned with. James 5:16 (NLT)

I can barely say this one, Jesus. Someone's child has died. And not just the child, but so many dreams, so many hopes for a future that won't unfold the way they thought it would. Peace has been stripped away; the splendor of a young, beautiful life is gone. I know your heart is broken, and this family must be crushed and overwhelmed beyond their ability to endure. This awful time will never be forgotten. How does one comfort another in such a time? Perhaps they can't. Perhaps only you can bring succor in a time like this.

I beg you to rescue this family from danger. The powers that oppose you have risen up and will seek to crush any vessel that attempts to receive the outpouring of your love. Bind up this marriage, Lord. Send your angels to defend your people. Build a fortress around this suffering, grieving family. Help them to rely on you.

And send people who are sturdy in the faith to pray over and stand with this family. Not just now, when the news is fresh and the pain brand-new, but send them later, as the shadows lengthen, the evening comes, and the rest of the world seems to have moved on.

May the story of Natalie's life be told and celebrated and remembered. Something truly beautiful has passed away. We are left in your hands, awaiting your hope.

busted but hopeful

1-2Since God has so generously let us in on what he is doing, we're not about to throw up our hands and walk off the job just because we run into occasional hard times. We refuse to wear masks and play games. We don't maneuver and manipulate behind the scenes. And we don't twist God's Word to suit ourselves. Rather, we keep everything we do and say out in the open, the whole truth on display, so that those who want to can see and judge for themselves in the presence of God.

3-4If our Message is obscure to anyone, it's not because we're holding back in any way. No, it's because these other people are looking or going the wrong way and refuse to give it serious attention. All they have eyes for is the fashionable god of darkness. They think he can give them what they want, and that they won't have to bother believing a Truth they can't see. They're stone-blind to the dayspring brightness of the Message that shines with Christ, who gives us the best picture of God we'll ever get.

5-6Remember, our Message is not about ourselves; we're proclaiming Jesus Christ, the Master. All we are is messengers, errand runners from Jesus for you. It started when God said, "Light up the darkness!" and our lives filled up with light as we saw and understood God in the face of Christ, all bright and beautiful.

7-12If you only look at us, you might well miss the brightness. We carry this precious Message around in the unadorned clay pots of our ordinary lives. That's to prevent anyone from confusing God's incomparable power with us. As it is, there's not much chance of that. You know for yourselves that we're not much to look at. We've been surrounded and battered by troubles, but we're not demoralized; we're not sure what to do, but we know that God knows what to do; we've been spiritually terrorized, but God hasn't left our side; we've been thrown down, but we haven't broken. What they did to Jesus, they do to us—trial and torture, mockery and murder; what Jesus did among them, he does in us—he lives! Our lives are at constant risk for Jesus' sake, which makes Jesus' life all the more evident in us. While we're going through the worst, you're getting in on the best!

13-15We're not keeping this quiet, not on your life. Just like the psalmist who wrote, "I believed it, so I said it," we say what we believe. And what we believe is that the One who raised up the Master Jesus will just as certainly raise us up with you, alive. Every detail works to your advantage and to God's glory: more and more grace, more and more people, more and more praise!

16-18So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There's far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can't see now will last forever. 2 Corinthians 4 (The Message)

Dear God, I refuse to whine. I will not ask you to protect me or my family from the scars caused by the struggles of this life. I am deeply grateful that none of us have been overwhelmed by negativity or pessimism as a result of our relatively minor discomforts in this rich life we live. We are doing our best to fix our eyes on the interior goods of your Spirit in us and in our relationships, rather than the exterior stuff. I hope we are doing you honor by being the slightly cracked and certainly scratched-up people we are. Sometimes I try to buff the worst of the damage out, but honestly, everyone knows I'm not a brand-new Lexus or something; no point in pretending. I hope I am keeping in your favor. I'm doing my best to show you high and lifted up, and not distract others from experiencing you because I want their attention for myself. Thank you for loving me in spite of everything.